Reese McHenry was often described as a force of nature. After growing up in northern Minnesota and western Wisconsin, she settled in the Triangle in 2000 and went on to become an icon of the local music scene, making waves and her voice heard in the early 2000s with her band The Dirty Little Heaters. Reese played with her entire heart and soul, and had one of the most distinctive and powerful voices anyone ever heard.
In 2008 her musical career stalled when she suffered four strokes. After having a pacemaker installed, she spent the next several years in recovery before building up the strength to return to the scene with a new band called The Second Wife. In 2017 she released "Bad Girl" under her own name, backed by the band Spider Bags. After that record, McHenry continued to perform and release records as a solo artist backed by musicians from around the Triangle.
Health issues struck McHenry again in 2022 when she was diagnosed with pleomorphic sarcoma, a rare soft tissue cancer. After a long battle, she passed away on November 14, 2024 at the age of 51. A GoFundMe has been set up to help Reese’s husband Justin cover medical and other costs.
WUNC Music reached out to the Triangle music community to ask about what Reese meant to them.
"I think the main thing about Reese was how unique she was. She lived such a rich and varied life. Her stories could make my jaw drop and laugh until I was in pain. She overcame so many things most people would never shut up about if it happened to them, but she had endless capacity to listen to others and be supportive and selfless. She loved life sincerely and she appreciated it. Once when we were on tour together, we saw a dead deer in the road and she sighed and said, “Surely there must be a heaven for deer.” When she saw me looking at her like she was nuts, we laughed so hard we almost ran off the road.
Obviously her voice is so powerful, but her lyrics are too. They are clever and heartbreaking, and she just rocked her ass off onstage and in the studio. I will miss the goofy songs she’d make up and the crazy things she would say, and catching up on the phone for hours and hours. We laughed so much together. She was easy to love." - Lydia Loveless
“Reese was a force of nature: Whenever she stood on a stage she blew everyone away. The power she had as a singer, player and performer would electrify an audience straight out of a daze and awaken them to their lives. Intimidating as that fierceness was on a stage, off stage she was hilarious, kind, empathetic, always looking to connect and talk about the struggles of being a woman in this business as well as the joys of making noise and music in the face of the void. Larger than this life, a big sister who taught me and all the many people inspired by her to be equal parts tough and big hearted.” - Skylar Gudasz
“What can be said about Reese McHenry in a single quote? Not enough, I can assure you as much. How anyone can live as full a life as she did, in the face of all of the obstacles she overcame, and always with an infectious smile and laugh is beyond me. Reese was one of the bravest people I've ever met and the world is less because she's no longer in it.” - Michael Venutolo-Mantovani, Suah Sounds Records
“My dear, old friend Reese and I have been friends for a very long time (2002). The music community lost a truly powerful person. Reese was one of the strongest, most loving, brutally honest, hilarious, talented, compassionate, brilliant, beautiful shining stars I was lucky enough to have known. She was so creative. We played in The Dirty Little Heaters together… and those were some memories I will always cherish. My heart goes out to Justin, Reese’s husband. Who was at her side as always, when she left us. Take care of each other, and tell your people you love them. ❤️ “ - Rob Walsh, Local 506
“As you've seen many people repeat, Reese was a force of nature. That isn't hyperbole - she was unique that way. Strong, funny, the light of any room she walked into, with the most powerful, emotional voice you'd find anywhere. She had the best banter onstage as well - witty, self-effacing, approachable, but definitely un-fuck-withable. Didn't put up with shit - again, nobody would want to fuck with her - yet a sweet, sweet soul. She made you feel special - another superpower of hers. I saw Amelia Riggs post that she was her "surrogate music mom" - I feel that encapsulates how a lot of us felt, if our mom was also a badass songwriter with a supernatural voice. She leaves an imprint on each of us who knew her or even saw her perform. Our music community would not be nearly as interesting if she weren't such a large part of it. So many people loved her, and always will. Reese McHenry forever.” - Reid Johnson, Schooner
"I can't say enough about the powerhouse of a performer, the pure force that is Reese McHenry. I know I'm not being original with the Janis Joplin comparison, but that certainly tracks. Her song "Detroit" goes so hard. I'm listening to it as I write and remember her. We've been on numerous bills together and, whether doing her own thing or sitting in with Spider Bags or The Dynamite Bros., her voice and stage presence was only outsized by her warmth. I consider Reese pivotal to my introduction and love of and inclusion in the Raleigh music scene. Every time I saw her play, I made it a point to tell her how dope she was. And she always made me feel like I just might could possibly be as dope as she.
On a sidenote: about 8 of my family members drove up from Mount Olive to Raleigh for me and my wife's wedding, but they were not comfortable driving the additional leg of the journey out to Haw River Ballroom, so Reese drove them. I just looked back at my texts to read her glowing review of my family's boisterous humor, which I can only imagine the frequency of voices she had to bear during that van ride! I texted my family the sad news and, even in the short time they spent together, they confirmed what we all know. So loving. So generous. I will remember Reese McHenry with joy, always." - shirlette ammons
"What was amazing about Reese was that she was this amazing, ferocious performer who was also this sweet, kind, supportive, unpretentious, hilarious person. Anyone who ever heard her voice was in awe of her, pretty much instantly. But she was also down-to-earth, a fervent supporter of local music, generously offering others accolades while providing self-deprecating banter onstage and off. We will all miss her." - Eric Roehrig, Erie Choir
"Reese was many things to me. A darling friend. A great singer. An awesome house sitter for our dogs. We loved being around her. She was a strong willed, but funny person. Intelligent and caring. I will always see and hear her singing. There will never be another Reese McHenry in our world. She was one in a million” - John Agnello, music producer
“I'll never forget when I was dealing with some chronic health issues and Reese just DMed me when she saw and offered her Hulu password. That's just who she was. She had a way of making you feel like you were the only person in the room when she talked to you - equal parts deep listener and compelling artist. Reese really cared about people, especially other musicians. If there was any way she could make your life a little lighter, she'd be there to help ease the load." - Steph Stewart, Blue Cactus
“I have played guitar for Reese since sometime in 2017. She was truly a magnetic, never-met-a-stranger type person, and she had a special place for all the weirdos and underdogs and ne'er do wells that haunted any nighttime-type place we would go. I think about everyone who came in contact with her remembered it, and I think that was true outside of music as much as within it. She loved and craved performing, and I remember playing those last two shows in August and now knowing more about how much pain she was actually in, and I have to imagine those moments of being on stage and redlining the board with her voice were when she probably felt the lightest and the free-est of the pain. She created a huge community and people followed her and loved her because she was unashamedly real and herself, on-stage and off. You could talk to her about anything, on-stage and off, her audience banter moments are some of favorite show memories. Her quick wit and cutting humor was always tempered though with tenderness and intimacy. She was always ready to lend her skills to any benefit or cause, and was always supportive of other groups, she truly loved music and music people. Much much more can and will be written about Reese McHenry. She was one of the greatest friends I've ever had and completely changed my life, I'm so grateful for the time we had together, it was the joy and honor of a lifetime to play for Reese McHenry. I will miss her every day for the rest of the my life.
I'll add another thing more related to music. She should be remembered as a one-of-a-kind and generational vocalist, equally adept at barn-burning and heart string tugging, but she was also an incredibly talented and perceptive songwriter. I hope people dig back into her music and the lyrics and appreciate the breadth and depth of her abilities, she's written some absolutely classic songs that I'd put up against about anything else. Absolutely indispensable and irreplaceable.” - Mike Wallace, Verity Den
“I met Reese close to twenty years ago when I first became enmeshed in the local music community. In my earliest days in Durham I learned very quickly that even among a vibrant scene of musicians, songwriters and artists Reese was by far the most respected of everyone. She was the most naturally talented, funniest and most generous person I’ve ever met. She fought harder to be here than any of us should ever have to and deserved twice as many years as she was afforded. There will never be anyone like Reese but we’re all better people for having been touched by her spirit.” - Rusty Sutton, The Glow
"I feel lucky to have just been there. As you know, she continued to fight through a lot of things, and always delivered. It has been tremendously gratifying watching Reese grow and find her voice and confidence as an artist. When the Dirty Little Heaters, that first duo, first started getting people's attention around town, it was great, because now all of these other people, many of them my friends, were now getting to know what I already knew about Reese, about how great she was. When I saw her band play the Pour House at Hopscotch in 2022(?), I was blown away with just how good she was, how good her band was, and how far she had come in two decades." - Chris Rossi, Salt Maps
"She did whatever the hell she wanted to do when she wanted to do it, and she always gave it her all, whether it was songwriting, touring, or loving her people. When Reese was in, she was ALL in. She loved her friends hard and made sure they knew it, made sure they felt it. She was the kind of person who didn’t hesitate to ask favors because she knew that we’d all do anything for her because she’d do anything for us." - Kerry Cantwell, Horizontal Hold
"I'm really going to miss that big hearted strong loyal beautiful powerhouse. Reese was one of the first people that I ever toured with and one of the longest standing musical relationships I had. She's never gone from Durham. Her open hearted siren roar lives on in the walls of our venues and in our songs." Kym Register, The Pinhook
"Like everyone else she encountered, Reese always made me feel like I was the most important person in the world when we spoke- I was always amazed at how easily I opened up to her whenever we ran into each other- and how much better I always felt after we’d hung out together. She was a singer’s singer, the kind of vocalist all of us in the game aspire to be, the kind of vocalist who inspires adjectives like “commanding,” “powerful,” and “mellifluous,” and in Reese’s case, they were truly apt descriptors.
One of the last times I saw her was when we played at the Pour House for Hopscotch 2023. I spoke with her briefly before the show - we always talked about doing a duet on “I’d Rather Go Blind,” and that night was no different - and when we started playing she was right down front bopping her head and moving her body. There were some celebs there who had drifted in, J. Mascis being one, but I can honestly say that seeing Reese grooving to me and my band like that meant more to me than it would have if it had been damn near anyone else. I’ve never forgotten it. And I never will." - John Howie Jr.
"I was Reese's favorite. At least that is what she made me believe. She told me every time we talked that she loved me, so much she "wanted to smash windows", loved me "as much as the sand in the sea". This is a gift: to love your people so fiercely they never doubt. And I loved her back. Reese was brilliant, clever, and hilarious. She told the truth, compassionate and brutal, both in her songs and in life. She listened to my heartbreak, comforted me and was always on my side. Her voice was larger than life, and will continue to sing in my heart for the rest of mine.
Here's what she said to tell people when they asked how she was doing in the last months: "do you think they'll ask? Tell them I took my crystals high on Mount Mitchell and plan to fix everything that's wrong. I'm starting with global warming, I'll go from there. Oh, didn't you hear? She is fixing everything. We're having a love affair and stealing all the honey from these fucking bears". Get to work, Reesey, I will miss you forever." - Mimi McLaughlin, The Pneurotics and Magnolia Collective
"It's hard to put into words how wonderful a person Reese was, and how much her friends, family and musical comrades will miss her. She was a shining light of
positive energy. Hysterical, cheeky, supportive, generous and one of the most talented people I've ever met. She was so filled with life, the kind we should all be lucky enough
to find. It's such a sad day for all of us but let's keep trying to fight the good fight with love, kindness, humor, music and art in the name of Reese McHenry." - Ron Liberti, Pipe
"I played in several bands with Reese over the years (Lake & Hennepin, Second Wife, Dirty Little Heaters) and those shows were always the most fun shows. Reese could out-heckle any heckler in the room, and then be friends with them after the show. Nothing ever rattled her. One time a guest musician hadn't made it to the club and the show had started, so Reese called them from the stage. The show must go on! Never a dull moment. She could pull things out of you that you never expected." - Bob Wall
"I met Reese when she offered to drive Drag Sounds to Asheville in 2018, and I'm pretty sure she offered just so she could play her own set. 2 days later she asked me if I wanted to play in one of an infinite iterations of her band and we were tied ever since. Over 6 years I've been continuously shocked at how many people knew Reese, loved her music, and have a personal memory shared only between them. The sheer amount of life she's experienced would have killed anyone else, but she always burst through with a smirk, a joke, and shot in hand. This was her world, we're just living in it, and as she loved to say "that's not nothing". Thank you for folding me into your life, Reese." - Thomas McNeely, Cor de Lux
"Reese and I go back to 2009. I was working the door at Local 506 when we met through our mutual and dear friend Rob Walsh, who played in the legendary Dirty Little Heaters with her. We became fast friends. Reese had this incredible enthusiasm for life and for the people she loved.
I’ve spent so many nights with her and others, singing songs into the wee hours, talking, laughing, and just living. I’m still processing that she’s gone. To be honest, I haven’t let it fully hit me yet. Outside of being an absolutely brilliant songwriter and SINGER (ALL CAPS), she was the kind of friend we all need—the one who inspires us, makes us laugh at the absurdity of modern life, and tells us the truth even when we don’t want to hear it. She kept me on my toes and brought so much inspiration and valuable lessons to my life. This is a loss I’m going to feel for a long, long time.
She loved my song “Manteo,” and it meant so much to me that it resonated with her the way it did. About ten years ago, after her first stroke, I visited her in the hospital. I brought my guitar and sang “Manteo” by her bedside. It was such a special moment, and she told me how much it meant to her.
When we did our 10-year anniversary show for the first Love Language album at the Cat’s Cradle, Reese and her amazing band opened the night. Then she joined us on stage for “Manteo.” I’m so grateful that the great Triangle music supporter and documenter John Guerin was there to capture it. There was a fire in that performance that Reese truly lit.
My heart goes out to her family and loved ones. I hope they know I’m here for them, always." - Stuart McLamb, The Love Language, Fancy Gap
