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Why the midlife crisis for Millennials looks different from elder generations

AILSA CHANG, HOST:

And if you out there are a millennial listening to me right now, I do have a question for you. Are you in crisis? What I mean is, are you in a millennial midlife crisis? I am told this is actually a thing. I didn't even think millennials were old enough to have a midlife crisis, but my next guest, Brittany Luse, says it is possible. Not only is Brittany a millennial, she is also the host of NPR's It's Been A Minute podcast, which is all about what's going on in culture. And Brittany, you recently explored what a millennial midlife crisis can look like, right?

BRITTANY LUSE, BYLINE: Yes, we did.

CHANG: (Laughter).

LUSE: Yes, we did.

CHANG: Wait, wait, wait. So are you having a midlife crisis right now or something?

LUSE: Well, thankfully, I am not. I don't like to think of myself as midlife for another couple of years, when I turn 40. But I am here to report that a midlife crisis looks a lot different for millennials than it did for Gen X or for boomers.

CHANG: OK, say more because when I think of the stereotype of a midlife crisis, I think - sorry - I think of a middle-aged guy. Why is it always a guy in my head?

LUSE: (Laughter).

CHANG: And he's, like, buying a Porsche and cheating on his wife. So what does that look like on a millennial?

LUSE: Yes. Your stereotype, I think, is the broader cultural stereotype of what a midlife crisis looks like. But for past generations, it was about blowing up a picturesque, stable life and giving in to impulse. You know, there was a blueprint for life - going to college, getting married, having kids, advancing in your career and sticking to that same career for a long time. And then, at middle age, you blow it all up.

That is not the case for millennials. Millennials have not been meeting those life milestones due to a lot of economic and social upheaval during our adult lifetimes. And so the millennial midlife crisis is about finding what older generations tended to blow up. Here's how Sara Srygley, a research associate who studies demographic trends at the nonprofit Population Reference Bureau, described it to me.

SARA SRYGLEY: A midlife crisis for millennials does look different, from what I've seen, in terms of being less about sort of upending this really stable life because for many millennials, life has never been stable, and more about trying to find something that feels stable and sustainable for you moving forward.

LUSE: So instead of buying a convertible, you're wondering about, how do I save up to buy a house, and is that a realistic goal for me? And if not, what is an attainable goal?

CHANG: I mean, yeah, I get it, because if you think about it, there was - what? - the 2008 financial crisis...

LUSE: Ah, yes.

CHANG: ...All the ways tech and the internet redefined work for everyone, how, like, you're always connected, so you never really stop working. There was, of course, the pandemic.

But I also want to just push back a little bit, Brittany, because millennials, they do have it better than some past generations. I mean, they're more educated than previous generations were at the same age. Their median net worth is higher, right? So what are you complaining about, people?

LUSE: You are right.

CHANG: (Laughter).

LUSE: You're right. All those things are true. And the costs of these traditional goals are so much more expensive. Ailsa, let's play "The Price Is Right." Pretend I'm Bob Barker, OK?

CHANG: (Laughter).

LUSE: How much do you think this average American life costs, OK? Raising two children, putting them through college, owning a home, having one annual vacation and a funeral - what is the price tag on it all (ph)?

CHANG: Oh, my God. OK. Well, as a woman who chose not to have kids, I feel like I have no realistic idea, but my wild guess is it takes at least $1 million.

LUSE: OK. Well, I'll do you one better. I was talking with Wailin Wong, host of NPR's The Indicator From Planet Money, and she shared some figures from an Investopedia analysis. Are you ready?

CHANG: Yeah.

LUSE: OK. So all of that costs an estimated $4.4 million, Ailsa.

CHANG: Holy...

LUSE: You can't even say what you really want to say, OK?

CHANG: (Laughter).

LUSE: And that is, though, about 1 million more dollars...

CHANG: Wow.

LUSE: ...Than most Americans make in a lifetime.

CHANG: That's crazy to me.

LUSE: Yes. And on top of that, millennials have more debt and are more likely to hold multiple jobs at the same time and change careers. So the path and the blueprint are just different. Here's Sara again.

SRYGLEY: So what arriving looks like differs. But I think also, increasing your financial wellbeing as a millennial is hard because in many cases, the way to do that is to find a new job. And so there's that lack of stability and never really feeling that, like, settled-in feeling that previous generations were able to. And so you're kind of always reinventing as a millennial. You're always changing and shifting and pivoting.

LUSE: OK, so that sounds kind of dire, but there are some ways in which all this change and upheaval can actually be a good thing for midlife millennials.

CHANG: For all of us, right? Not just millennials.

LUSE: Yes. Like, all the resilience we've had to develop might actually help us in life, and we get into that in our full episode.

CHANG: All right. Stay tuned, people. There is hope. Brittany, thank you so much for taking the time to speak with me.

LUSE: Oh, thanks again, Ailsa.

CHANG: That is Brittany Luse. She is the host of NPR's It's Been A Minute, a show all about exploring what's going on in culture. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.

NPR transcripts are created on a rush deadline by an NPR contractor. This text may not be in its final form and may be updated or revised in the future. Accuracy and availability may vary. The authoritative record of NPR’s programming is the audio record.

Ailsa Chang is an award-winning journalist who hosts All Things Considered along with Ari Shapiro, Audie Cornish, and Mary Louise Kelly. She landed in public radio after practicing law for a few years.
Brittany Luse
Brittany Luse is an award-winning journalist, on-air host, and cultural critic. She is the host of It's Been a Minute and For Colored Nerds. Previously Luse hosted The Nod and Sampler podcasts, and co-hosted and executive produced The Nod with Brittany and Eric, a daily streaming show. She's written for Vulture and Harper's Bazaar, among others, and edited for the podcasts Planet Money and Not Past It. Luse and her work have been profiled by publications like The New York Times, The New Yorker, Vulture, and Teen Vogue.
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