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Lightning Fill In The Blank

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

It is time to move on to our final game Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer now worth 2 points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS: Alonzo and Amy each have 4. Roy has 3.

SAGAL: All right, Roy, you're in third place so you're up first. The clock will start when I begin your first question. Fill in the blank. After a shooting on Wednesday, on Thursday, the charity baseball game between members of blank went on as scheduled.

ROY BLOUNT JR: Members of Congress.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, a federal judge ordered a new environmental review of the blank pipeline.

BLOUNT JR: Oh, I wrote this down. It's...

(LAUGHTER)

BLOUNT JR: I mean, I didn't write it down here, obviously. Oh, I've forgotten the name of the something-something pipeline.

SAGAL: The Dakota Access Pipeline. After 17 months, a University of Virginia student was released from prison in blank, where he was accused of trying to steal a propaganda poster.

BLOUNT JR: Oh, man, North Korea.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Thursday, jurors in blank's trial said they were deadlocked.

BLOUNT JR: Now, I just remembered the other one now.

(LAUGHTER)

BLOUNT JR: Bill Cosby.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: In order to avoid the rain, a man shopping for groceries in China blanked.

BLOUNT JR: He - he had knitted together a lot of organic vegetables and held them over his head.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: No. He drove his little smart car directly into the grocery store.

BLOUNT JR: Oh.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: On Sunday, the Pittsburgh Penguins won their second straight blank.

BLOUNT JR: Stanley Cup.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Best known for playing Batman in the 1960's TV series, actor blank passed away.

BLOUNT JR: Adam West.

SAGAL: Farewell, old chum.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

BLOUNT JR: Yeah.

SAGAL: After police caught her trying to steal a flat screen TV from a Walmart...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...A college student in Wyoming explained that she wasn't shoplifting. She was blanking.

BLOUNT JR: She was doing her homework.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

BLOUNT JR: Oh.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: I'm going to give it to you.

BLOUNT JR: How about that?

SAGAL: She was doing research for her term paper on kleptomania.

BLOUNT JR: Oh, there you go.

SAGAL: The unnamed college student is facing three felony charges - one for attempting to steal the TV, the other two for the thousands of dollars in stolen goods that investigators found when they visited her dorm room. Student still contends that she only stole the items as research but recently asked her professor for research help on a new paper titled, "The Cultural History Of Breaking Out Of Prison Using A Nail File Baked In A Cake."

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Roy do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Roy, you're coming on strong. Six right, 12 more points, a total of 15 and the lead.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Bill, we have flipped a coin. Amy is elected to go first. Here you go. Fill in the blank. This week it was revealed that special counsel blank was investigating President Trump for possible obstruction of justice.

AMY DICKINSON: Mueller.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Monday, a second appeals court upheld the freeze on Trump's blank ban.

DICKINSON: Immigration.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Muslim ban, travel ban. On Wednesday, the Fed announced it would once again raise blanks.

DICKINSON: Interest rates.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Sunday, voters in Puerto Rico voted overwhelmingly to back a non-binding referendum calling for blank.

DICKINSON: Statehood.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Owners of a Texas tire shop are doubting their guard dog's effectiveness after thieves broke in and stole blank.

DICKINSON: The dog.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A recent study found...

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: ...That over 15 million Americans think that chocolate milk blanks.

DICKINSON: Sucks.

SAGAL: No, just comes out of brown cows.

DICKINSON: Oh, stop it.

SAGAL: It's true.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: The musicals "Dear Evan Hansen" and "Hello, Dolly!" we're the big winners of the 2017 blanks.

DICKINSON: Tony awards.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A woman in Canada who bought a bottle of expensive vitamins demanded...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...A full refund after she discovered blank.

DICKINSON: There were rat droppings in there.

SAGAL: No, that instead of vitamins, the bottle was filled with dried pasta.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Anna Bauer-Ross says she paid over $50 for the bottle of vitamins. So naturally, she wanted a refund when she found out it was just dried penne pasta. The manager of the store offered an exchange. And Anna grabbed a new bottle only to find that it, too, was filled with pasta. The same was true of a third and fourth bottle. It's all pretty outrageous. But you know who the real victim is - the person who just served their family a delicious plate of multivitamins alla vodka.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Amy do on our quiz?

KURTIS: She got 6 right, 12 more points just like Roy. But she has a total of 16, squeezing past him.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: And how many then does Alonzo need to win?

KURTIS: Six to tie. Seven to win.

ALONZO BODDEN: Pressure, pressure.

SAGAL: Pressure. Here we go, Alonzo. This is for the game. This week, five Michigan officials were charged with involuntary manslaughter in relation to the water crisis in blank.

BODDEN: Flint.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Right.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Officials report that people are still missing following a massive fire at an apartment building in blank.

BODDEN: England.

SAGAL: Right, London.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week a tape leaked showing the prime minister of blank making fun of Donald Trump.

BODDEN: Mexico.

SAGAL: No. Australia this time.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: While fueling up at a gas station, a car thief's stolen vehicle was blanked.

BODDEN: Stolen.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Monday, The Golden State Warriors beat the blanks to win their second NBA title in three years.

BODDEN: Cleveland Cavaliers.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A woman in California hoping to comfort her sick grandmother got around a hospital's No Pet policy by blanking.

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

BODDEN: Obviously, she had to sneak in a pet.

KURTIS: How?

BODDEN: Oh, as a pregnancy, as a baby?

SAGAL: As a baby, yes.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Shelby Hennick, the greatest granddaughter on Earth, knew her sick grandmother would appreciate a visit from her beloved Pomeranian. So despite the hospital's pointless no-pets-that-lick-their-own-butts policy, Shelby swaddled the furry blob in a blanket and simply carried it in pretending it was just a really hairy baby.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, did Alonzo knew well enough to win?

KURTIS: He got 5 right, 10 more points, but at 14, he didn't quite move past Amy. Amy's our winner. *** Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.

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