PETER SAGAL, HOST:
Coming up, it's Lightning Fill In The Blank. But first, it's the game where you have to listen for the rhyme. If you'd like to play on air, call or leave a message at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. Or click the contact us link on our website waitwait.npr.org. There you can find out about attending our weekly live shows back at the Chase Bank Auditorium in Chicago. And be sure to check out the latest How To Do Everything podcast. This week, Mike and Ian tell you how to lift weights with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Hi, you're on WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME.
PETER MCGINNIS: Hi.
SAGAL: Hi, who's this?
MCGINNIS: This is Peter McGinnis...
SAGAL: Hey, Peter McGinnis.
MCGINNIS: ...From Manchester, N.H.
SAGAL: From Manchester?
MCGINNIS: You bet you.
SAGAL: Yeah. Oh, I can hear the accent. And what do you do there in Manchester?
MCGINNIS: Well, depending on the day and time, I'm a pharmacy tech, photographer, a voice actor and a percussionist with the Jazz Dogs.
SAGAL: Wow. You're like, a New Hampshire renaissance guy.
MCGINNIS: Kind of.
(APPLAUSE)
SAGAL: So when you do voiceover work, are you called in for your genuine New Hampshire accent?
MCGINNIS: I try to be. I offer it is one of my, you know, down east, yeah, yeah, yeah.
SAGAL: Oh.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Well, that's great.
MCGINNIS: Yeah, yeah.
SAGAL: Can you tell me that you can't get there from here?
MCGINNIS: You can't get there from here.
SAGAL: Oh.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Well, Peter, welcome to the show. Bill Kurtis is going to read for you three news-related limericks with the last word or phrase missing from each. If you can fill in that last word or phrase correctly on two of the limericks, you'll be a big winner. You ready to play?
MCGINNIS: Absolutely.
SAGAL: Here is your first limerick.
BILL KURTIS: With kale leaves from farmer Snoop's plot, I think I'll like smoothies a lot. The sticky green juice makes me feel really loose. He has hybridized kale plants with...
MCGINNIS: Pot.
SAGAL: Pot, yes.
KURTIS: Pot it is.
SAGAL: Pot, yes.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL, APPLAUSE)
SAGAL: Brooklyn-based food lab Williamsburg Wonders has found a way to get people to take their marijuana. Combine it with delicious kale.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: It's called Kaleabis.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: That shows they were not high enough when they named it.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Kaleabis is just like regular kale, so you'll still hate it. But now you won't remember why.
(LAUGHTER)
MO ROCCA: Wow, they really should - you know, really, this experiment isn't working. They really should illegalize kale.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Ban it. Kale and marijuana - it's so weird to combine something you like so much with something you hate. It's like having sex with your dentist.
(LAUGHTER)
ROXANNE ROBERTS: That's an oddly specific metaphor.
SAGAL: Yeah, I know.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Here is your next limerick.
KURTIS: It's my favorite past time or sport, but I'm not often asked to cavort. Try as I might, I'm prejudged by my height. I have far fewer flings 'cause I'm...
MCGINNIS: Short.
KURTIS: Yes.
SAGAL: That's right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: Short is the answer.
(APPLAUSE)
SAGAL: According to a new study from Chapman University, short heterosexual men and women tend to have fewer partners than people of average height. Now, this study cited a number of factors - the height preferences of women - they like taller men, short people's funny, short, little fingers.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: But let's face it, it is a turnoff when your boyfriend has to ask for a boost when he wants to make out.
(LAUGHTER)
LUKE BURBANK: I believe half of that research you just quoted it directly from a Randy Newman song.
SAGAL: I think so.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Here is your last limerick.
KURTIS: France has air, but their taste is quite futile. Don't cook pasta, France. Keep grooming poodles. Your vile carbonara will win no tiara. Your French themes have butchered our...
MCGINNIS: Noodles.
SAGAL: Yes, noodles.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: Very good. France and Italy - it's an international scandal. They're battling over something seriously called Carbonaragate.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Carbonaragate is a dispute over a French cooking site's recipe for, quote, "one-pot pasta carbonara." That's a classic Italian dish. Italians are so mad, some are even calling for their prime minister to intervene. You do not to mess with a country's beloved foods. We're talking like Italy is overreacting, right? But remember how mad we were when France made that McRib with propionic hydroxybenzoate instead of butylated hydroxyanisole?
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: It's tradition.
BURBANK: Yes.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: It's kind of nice that it's a pasta recipe that's causing a fight between Italy and France. The last time they were on opposite sides of a fight it was over the question - are Nazis good?
(LAUGHTER)
ROCCA: It's not like they put kale it. I mean...
SAGAL: That's true.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Bill, how did Peter do on our quiz?
KURTIS: Peter did great. He got them all right.
SAGAL: Well done, Peter.
(APPLAUSE)
MCGINNIS: Thank you so much.
SAGAL: That's really good. Thank you so much for playing.
MCGINNIS: OK. It was great. Thanks.
SAGAL: Bye-bye.
(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC) Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.